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Lesson 13
A RULE FOR COMMUNICATION

A Rule for Communication

Why is A Rule for Communication significant?

The first reason having a rule for communication is significant is because it reinforces (Above the Line Thinking). By making a rule for communication you are building moral, ethical, and spiritual boundaries for yourself and others. If we know that no man can tame the tongue, and we are in a spiritual battle over the mind, then it behooves us to create these boundaries (rules) for our communication.

 

Is there anything more secretly delicious than gossip – idle talk and rumors about other’s intimate lives? What is conversation for, if not hush-hush chatter about other people? Don’t we feel better when we find out what’s wrong with others? Those that feed on this type of impulse give way to an amateur and wayward journalist who are less concerned with telling the truth than capturing an audience. This is our society to a "tee."

 

Yet, God knows we will be tempted on the daily; however, because he knows this, he also provides a way for us to escape these temptations.

 

“No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it” (NIV, 1 Corinthians 10:13).

 

Clearly put, when we set boundaries or rules for communication, we begin to heighten our awareness of not only what we say, but how we say it. And we guard ourselves from depreciating one another and humanity as a whole.

 

What is A Rule for Communication?

It’s a boundary. It’s a standard. It’s a moral and ethical line in the sand. The very first rule is always ask what God says about a certain topic or situation, by studying his word and researching to gain understanding for wisdom. Second, beware of your thinking (Above the Line / Below the Line Thinking) by guarding your mind. Third, be purposeful to not partake in rumors and gossip, for I absolutely know that there is no power or personal growth in the depreciation of another.

 

“Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying that it may minister grace unto the hearers” (KJV, Ephesians 4:29).

 

What’s at stake? God’s purpose and vision for you is at stake, which includes your relationships both personal and professional. According to the Huffington Post, 65 percent of all relationship breakups are because of communication breakdowns or misunderstandings. Therefore, it is imperative to identify the patterns of your words and make a rule for communication. How often do you share personal and confidential conversations about other people’s business?

 

How does your life reflect gossip, rumors, and idle talk? In this lesson we learn about the 24-hour rule and a whole lot more…

Tips/Nuggets 

“Let no corrupt communication talk come out of your mouth, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” - Ephesians 4:29


Seeking to understand first is a graceful walk of love and light and perspective in our communication.
 

Why is it significant to have “A Rule for Communication?” This is critical to establish a set of boundaries from the sin nature of keeping secrets, gossip, idle talk, and rumors.
Do you feel you have to walk on “egg shells?” If so, why?
Because when you walk in truth (which is to help set YOU free) you are in alignment with yourself and God. You cannot take responsibility for how someone else is going to take what you have to say.
However, you are responsible to yourself and your truth. Remember there is no condemnation in Christ. Therefore, in this lesson we discuss not only the Why it is significant to have a rule for your communication but also share with you many reason why if you don’t have them it could emotionally and spiritually spiral you down and possibly into sabotage and destruction.


Why is this so important? Well because 65 and 90 percent of everyday conversations are riddled in gossip, hearsay and rumor.
Isn’t any wonder “truth” today is muddled and so hard to find beyond all the white noise of deception and manipulation. This is more the reason to learn the techniques and skills to navigate this mind fill of confusion. Remember the Devils playground is idleness, boredom and curiosity. This coupled with ill informed knowledge and / or information is a recipe for disaster.
Last but not least, our relationships depend on trust and respect. In order for anyone to have trust they must be open, honest and vulnerable. And when this is walked out with evidence, respect is often rewarded.


What is “A Rule for Communication?” Throughout this lesson we will help you dive deeper into discovering the tools and techniques to create more awareness and support to acknowledge why this is important. As well as what you can do to avoid this pitfalls such rumor, gossip, idle talk, and secrets. We show you in God’s word what he says about these things and what we are to do in order to put them away.
We use the Red light, Yellow light and Green light theory in accordance with God’s word to share with you how to fight these pitfalls and establish a walk of trust and respect with yourself, others and God.
Lastly, we will help you discover the patterns of your words. You will assess how they are either serving you or hurting you. And most importantly we will help you to know what to do when someone offends you, criticizes you or harms you with this one simple 24 Hour Rule.
We encourage you to take yourself on and learn the greatest tool we have is our thoughts; however, these thoughts become reality the moment we speak or act them out. Be wise, learn how to tame the tongue and establish new found power by creating a rule for communication.

Going Deeper in the Word

In order to have effective communication that creates friendship, respect, intimacy and love we must remain in integrity. The way we walk in integrity is to trust and verify what’s being said to us about ourselves and others and not give place for rumors, lies, stories, and gossip.


What God’s word says about walking in Integrity with our communication (trust and verify)
Matthew 12:36 “I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak”
Proverbs 11:3 “The integrity of the upright guides them, but the crookedness of the treacherous destroys them.”
1 Peter 3:16 “Having a good conscience, so that, when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame.”
Philippians 4:8 “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”
2 Corinthians 8:21 “For we aim at what is honorable not only in the Lord's sight but also in the sight of man.”
Psalm 7:8 “The Lord judges the peoples; judge me, O Lord, according to my righteousness and according to the integrity that is in me.”


Is this you? Or do you know someone that likes to gossip, rumor and create strife?
Proverbs 16:28 “A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends.”
Proverbs 20:19 “Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets; therefore do not associate with a simple babbler.”
Psalm 34:13 “Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from s
peaking deceit.”
1 Timothy 5:13 “Besides that, they learn to be idlers, going about from house to house, and not only idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying what they should not.”
Exodus 23:1 “You shall not spread a false report. You shall not join hands with a wicked man to be a malicious witness.”
Romans 1:29 “They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetousness, malice. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips,”
Proverbs 17:4 “An evildoer listens to wicked lips, and a liar gives ear to a mischievous tongue.”
Proverbs 17:9 “Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.”

 

This is what the Lord hates
Proverbs 6:16-19 “There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers.”
Proverbs 101:5 “Whoever slanders his neighbor secretly I will destroy. Whoever has a haughty look and an arrogant heart I will not endure.”


Guard your lips because we will have to give an account
Psalm 141:3 “Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!”
Matthew 12:36 “I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak,”


In summary, truthfulness is Holy before the Lord. What you sow, you shall also reap. Therefore, be careful what you say, and be careful about what you entertain as truth for gossip, lies, rumors, stories, and strife come with adverse consequences that keep you from your higher self, your vision and God’s purpose for your life.

Resources

Take Advantage of the Resources we have put together for you!

When you utilize the workbook along with these resources, you will create lasting and undeniable results! 

Click HERE

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