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Lesson Song & Prayer

We LOVE how music and prayer prepares the heart to receive theLessons we are sharing.
We encourage you to listen to the song and prayer as you take several deep cleansing breaths before you start the lesson. 

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Why is it significant to have Connection Over Controversy? 

Connection over controversy is significant because your relationships, health and sanity depend on it. In a world where the majority of people are doing the best they can with what they know, it is best to respect each other's model of the world. However, although you can honor that space for others, you can make a conscious choice to not operate or spend your life's energy on people and circumstances that do not support your highest vision. Consequently, the type of connection over controversy we are describing, is not only in our day to day life, but also through generational trauma, hurt, guilt, shame, limited beliefs and negative emotions. These controversies have been known to cripple progress and success with a victim mentality. This can be a stumbling block for many. In this lesson you will be equipped to assess and look at what connections serve you and what controversies are holding you back.  


What is Connection Over Controversy? 

Connection over controversy is a necessary "microcosm" of awareness that must be addressed or it will creep into your life in unawares. In this lesson, you will come to understand why each of us "perceives" differently through our five senses (hearing, smell, touch, sight, and taste) and what drives our differences of opinions or experiences. We will discuss the science behind what drives these differences and perceptions. We will discuss what God says about our connections over controversy by washing away our dirty consciousness of limited beliefs and negative emotions that keeps us from living our best life now and in the future. You will learn how to choose not to pass onto your children or others the pain and hurt from the past. 


What "if" you applied "Connection Over Controversy?" This is an important question to ponder. First comes awareness, and then change. Imagine the possibilities if you learned how to focus your attention on your goals, vision, growth and expansion instead of others? In this lesson, we will walk you through to examine your past by identifying any negative patterns or generational curses (i.e., addictions, mental illness, depression, physical illnesses, and even a poverty mindset) passed down to you. You are not your past. Today is the day to make a conscious decision to stop living this way. 


Remember, you are the average of the five people you hang around. Therefore, "The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray." - Proverbs 12:26 


Connection over controversy is a CHOICE. Connection is all about you allowing oneself to see others as God sees them, not how you see them. Controversy is seeing another person with judgmental eyes, biases, presuppositions and prejudice. By contrast, negative judgement is a conscious act whereby one gives assent to a negative presupposition. This can include a racist view, bigotry, sexism, classism; therefore, the things that make you uncomfortable, or feel at odds, weird and not normal to you. Often times, these get passed down generationally. They are considered amoral patterns of behavior and are modeled after our parents and their parents.

#1 - One of the greatest gifts we can give anyone is the ability to respect their Model of the World. Know that each of us is dong the best we can with our current level of awareness - and we must do our best to honor that space.

#2 - And yet just because we can learn to honor each other’s space or model of the world, it does NOT mean we have to operate in that space or agree or spend our life’s energy on people and circumstances that do not support God’s highest vision for our life.

#3 - Typically from 8 months of age children are modeling their parents or those closest to them. According to National Health Institute (NIH) 53% of parents were not healthy role models for their children. 30.2% were limited healthy role models and 16.3% were good role models. So as you can see, understanding generational drama and patterns is critical and can bring clarity and the courage to change by breading the chains of bondage that holds us back.

#4 - You can choose NOT to pass onto your children your hurts, pains, and trauma of the past. You can choose not to focus on the hurt, guilt, shame, negative emotions or limited beliefs that have crippled you, while keeping you from everything God has in store for you.

Numbers 6:24-26 “The LORD bless thee, and keep thee: The LORD make his face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee: The LORD lift up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace.”

Going Deeper in the Word

Be Strong
2 Corinthians 12:10
"That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."


Romans 15:5
“May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you the same attitude of mind toward each other that Christ Jesus had.”


John 16:33
“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”


Psalm 121:1-2
“I lift up my eyes to the mountains—where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.”


Isaiah 41:10
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."


Exodus 15:2
"The Lord is my strength and my song; he has given me victory. This is my God, and I will praise him—my father’s God, and I will exalt him."


Joshua 1:9
"Be strong and courageous; do not be frightened and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."
Be comforted and at peace


Isaiah 26:3
"You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you."


1 Peter 5:7
“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”


Romans 12:18
"If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone."


Psalm 119:165
"Great peace have those who love your law, and nothing can make them stumble."


Isaiah 26:12
"Lord, you establish peace for us; all that we have accomplished, you have done for us."
Corinthians 14:33
"For God is not a God of disorder but of peace—as in the congregations of the Lord's people."


John 16:33
“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

Breaking Generational Patterns Curses
Exodus 20:5
“You shall not bow down to them or serve them, for I the Lord your God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and the fourth generation of those who hate me”


Ezekiel 18:19-20
“Yet you say, ‘Why should not the son suffer for the iniquity of the father?’ When the son has done what is just and right, and has been careful to observe all my statutes, he shall surely live. The soul who sins shall die. The son shall not suffer for the iniquity of the father, nor the father suffer for the iniquity of the son. The righteousness of the righteous shall be upon himself, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon himself.


Numbers 14:18
‘The Lord is slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love, forgiving iniquity and transgression, but he will by no means clear the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children, to the third and the fourth generation.’

Real Talk

Connection over Controversy is CHOICE. It’s what separates us from the world by learning how to Respect Another’s Model of the world. It doesn’t mean buying into it. It doesn’t mean accepting it. It means respecting it. And all healthy communication centers around whether or not you can establish a deeper level of understanding, rapport and trust. When you are able to do this it helps you to overcome boundaries and barriers to realize that this person or people you are communicating with is just as passionate as you are about what they represent or are talking about. And a difference of opinion is just that. It’s nothing personal. It’s just another way of looking at things. By last count, I think there is about 7 billion ways of looking at this planet.

It's a Choice
And as Believers, we have the choice and responsibility to model to those who do NOT know Jesus that we are a different kind of people because we serve a different God. Respecting others demonstrates the value of God places on life. Respecting others demonstrates the character of God in His humility, sacrificial love, and redemptive plan.

Purpose to see the Value in others
Instead, it means showing all people the love of Christ through what we do and how we treat them. Each person brings value to the world and to God's kingdom. We all have purpose, and we should treat all people mindfully and with great respect because God has deemed them of value
Prices we pay when you don’t
In this modern world we see it everywhere!!! It causes division, breakdown, chaos and civil disobedience


Examples: Disrespect and authority issues

  • Children to Parents

  • Students to Teachers

  • Citizens to Police

  • Spouses with Each other

  • News & Social Media


For example, God’s word warns against it in Deuteronomy 5:16 “Honor thy father and thy mother, as the LORD thy God hath commanded thee.” Disrespectful actions of children, no matter their age, are despised by God, and there's no place that's worse to see the disrespectful actions of children than in the home or in public.

2 Timothy 3:1-7
“But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power.”

What does the Bible say about treating others with respect
Matthew 7:12 “So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets." The Good News: This is literally "the golden rule" of the Bible. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. In other words, if you want to be treated with kindness, be kind to others.


Take Advantage of the Resources we have put together for you!

When you utilize the workbook along with these resources, you will create lasting and undeniable results! 

Click HERE

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